Mother Fucking Marinades

I’m bored of the same ‘ol shit I use. So, I asked you all what you like. You answered. And you had some really good shit going on. I’m expecting someone to invite me to dinner. Btw, I’m using your initials to protect the innocent. I’m not saying any of you are innocent but I’d hate for someone to find you on here that you’ve been hiding from. Because ya’ll aren’t innocent. I just know it.

A.H.E. – Garlic and Herb by Lawry’s (fucking love Lawry’s)

N.C. – A mixture of duck and soy sauce (I have about 283 packets of this shit in my fridge. I have a feeling it’s enough for a marinade)

A.R.H. – Good ‘ol Italian dressing (word.)

T.A. – Mojo, the Cuban marinade, made with orange, cumin, garlic and other flavors. (I like Cubans because I like Andy Garcia.)

A.M.B. – Ditto on the mojo…(pronounced Mo-Ho…snicker, snicker) It can be really salty, so if it’s going to marinate for long, or if I use it in the crockpot, I cut it with chicken broth. Throw it in the crockpot with some frozen chicken breasts, onions and serve with yellow rice and black beans. Arrribbaaaa! (I’m only half Cuban and don’t speak much Spanish other than what I learned in High School, so that’s all ya get from me, me amor!)

E.B.H. – A tablespoon each of honey, soy sauce and fish sauce (which smells like…well, we won’t discuss what it smells like) (fucking hilarious because we're all thinking the same thing)

D.H. – Equal parts of Dijon honey mustard, white wine and soy sauce. Brown chicken in minced garlic, pour in sauce and let simmer. It’s fantastic. AND EASY! (Wine makes me easy too.)

L.S.E. – Franks. Just Franks. (My tongue caught fire just reading that.)

T.S. (aka, my mother) – I brine rather than marinade. It develops the flavor of the chicken and any flavor you add in cooking will ramp up the whole dish. A simple brine is water about a half gallon, salt, sugar or honey and peppercorns. Just put everything in a gallon size Ziploc bag for one to four hours.

C.F. – Rub that shit with Olive Oil and sprinkle on some Tony Chachere’s seasoning – grill it – best chicken ever… (I must find this seasoning)

S.K.M. – How much salt in the brine? I heard it’s a lot. (S.K.M., you’re right. Hopefully my mom will answer this question, if not; I’ll call her and hound her ass until she tells me.)

M.D. – Olive Oil, minced garlic, fresh ground pepper and Old Bay seafood seasoning!! That shit ain’t just for seafood, it’s awesome on chicken and a great base for pork or for a beef rub! I also enjoy basting my chicken from the inside out with a nice can of Miller High Life mmmm yummy LOL!!!

(I like that M.D. is using the champagne of beers to baste his chicken in. Go for the gold man!)

B.S. – Garlic sautéed with a little white pepper, then deglaze with white zin or similar crappy cheap sweet wine, add Dijon and honey…pretty standard crap but its effin good. Grill it!!

(“crappy cheap sweet wine”. I like that. I don’t believe in spending a lot of money on the wine you’re cooking with. Really, I think it’s a total fucking myth.)

S.H. - Ken’s balsamic vinaigrette, minced garlic, Dijon mustard, soy sauce, garlic salt, pepper, oregano…marinade for a couple hours – grill. Delicious! (Oregano is by far my favorite spice and the fact that it looks like pot is hysterical to me because I'm that immature.)

J.J.J.F.M. – I make a curry bbq sauce to brush on my grilled chicken as it cooks. Marinates in basic OO, soy, balsamic worsteshire and garlic powder.

(uh…let’s figure out what name we’re using there Chiquita. That’s long ass initials. Love you :)

Thanks everyone for your participation. Hopefully you’ll find something new to try. If not, screw you. You got this far reading, so I’m happy.