Monday, March 19, 2012

Summer's Eve Chicken

The boyfriend and I are huge fans of salt and vinegar chips. If you aren’t, you need to grow some balls, toughen up your taste buds, and be a grown up. Same goes for eating broccoli.

Shit you’re gonna need:

4 Chicken Cutlets (I’m no expert on meat, well…maybe I am. But I believe that chicken cutlets are just thinned out chicken breasts. Yes? I used these because I didn’t want the chicken to cook unevenly and I didn’t want to cut anything myself. Lazy? You bet. The eight year old had baseball practice and the five year old was flinging a friggin’ rubber frog around the damn kitchen while I’m carrying on a conversation with the boyfriend. I needed shit as easy as possible here people.)

Mayonnaise (yes, mayo. Not hellman’s and not salad dressing. Just good ‘ol fattening, oil and egg, preservative filled mayo.)

A big bag of salt and vinegar chips (Now, my favorite s&v chips are the Cape Cod brand, but I was afraid that was a little too fancy and they were a little too thick and fucking expensive. Not that I’m afraid of anything to thick and all, I just knew that cheap Lay’s brand would be easier. With a name like “lay’s” I’m assuming everything is easy. Ha!

Shit you’re gonna do:

Preheat the oven to 350. Cover a baking a sheet with aluminum foil and spray it with some Kitchen KY (those of you who are new need to know that Kitchen KY is actually non-stick cooking spray.)

I had the five year old take his Pre-K frustrations and the inevitable time out he received today out on this poor bag of chips. I poured the entire bag into a big Ziploc bag and had him crush them up with a rolling pin. He was more than obliged to do such a task. God help us when he’s fifteen. He’s totally gonna be the kid that says “Hey…let’s jump off the roof of the house and into the pool.” and I’ll get a call and respond with “Sorry officer. I’ll be there in 15 min to pick him up.” Super proud.

So, once it’s all crushed, I poured the chips onto a plate and had the mayo on another. Put a thin layer of mayo on a piece of chicken (you’re gonna have to get your fingers a little dirty here princess) and then coat it in the crushed chips. Repeat with the other cutlets and bake for 30 min.

The mayo keeps things moist (insert dirty joke here) and the chips give it that crunch that you crave when your drunk ass drives up to taco bell at 2am. Admit it. You’ve been there.

Seriously ya’ll…that’s it. No flipping, no searing, and certainly not a lot of prep. Let me know how it turns out!