I make the Jolly Green Giant Drool

Cheese sauce for your Choppin Brocco-li...choppin brocco-li...she's choppin ber-ac-colli......CHOPPIN BROCCOLAY!!!!! Fucking love Dana Carvey...anyhoo...

Now, this sauce is the way that I get my monsters…I mean, my munchkins to eat broccoli. It’s the same ingredients as the cheese for mac and cheese, but just a little bit less and it takes the same amount of time to cook it as it does for your frozen broccoli to cook in the microwave. I’m sure you can pour this shit over anything you want, even your eggs in the morning, but you do what makes your panties dance.

Shit you’re gonna need:

Bag of frozen broccoli (don’t ask me the ounces on this shit, it’s just the regular size bag that feeds about four to five people)

1 tablespoon of butter

1 tablespoon of flour

‘bout half a cup of milk

Handful of cheese

Salt to taste

Shit you’re gonna do:

While your broccoli is in the microwave, melt your butter in a saucepan and when that’s done, add your flour and let that shitty flour taste cook out for a minute. Add your milk and wait for this shit to thicken. Pull it off the heat, add your cheese and salt and then drown your jolly green giants in this bad ass sauce. That’s it. Not fancy, but fucking good. Oddly enough, my three year old still dips his in ranch sauce. He’s weird. But so is Matthew McConaughey. And I’m okay with that.