Shit you’re gonna need:
1 doobie roll of sausage (that Jimmy Dean shit is what I’m talkin’ ‘bout)
Some dried basil and oregano (shit looks like pot. You know you agree with me)
Can of pizza dough (yes, you can make your own or buy the stuff from your bakery, but I have no idea how many fucking ounces you’ll need of this shit, so just buy the can)
Pepperoni (ummmmm, I used about 25 maybe? Just buy a pack and stuff some in your pie hole while you’re cooking. That’ll make about 42 you’ll need)
Marinara sauce (you won’t use a whole jar unless you’re a dipping whore like me. I dip my shit in everything. Chicken gets honey mustard, hot dogs get ketchup and pancakes get syrup)
Shredded Mozzarella Cheese (‘bout 1 ½ cups. But really, you’ll want to use a full two cups, which again is conveniently the same amount in those pre-shredded bags. Holy shit…I’m amazing)One egg, beaten (it’s to make the egg wash)
Shit you’re gonna do:Preheat your oven to 425. Brown up your sausage. When it’s almost done cooking, go ahead and season that shit with some dried basil and oregano. (Fucking love oregano. I think I’m almost Italian. Except that I have red hair, I’ve never had a tan and I say Ann-tan-a, instead of en-ten-na for the fucking rabbit ears on my aunts tv, but whatever).